Juicy conversation

Every now and then I have a conversation with a friend that cracks me up so much, it deserves to be put here unedited, and without commentary from me. Without further delay, I give you the comedic stylings of Brian Pflueger:

Brian: I have a juicer, a blender, a neat-o coffee maker (I actually use that one.) I've used the juicer probably... twice?

Me: bread maker? I NEED that! How else will I aquire bread stuffs?

Brian: Have you ever drank the juice of an egg?

Me: uhhhhh

Brian: It's not very good. I went around when I bought it and juiced the shit out of my pantry. Pickles! Cheese! Butter! Nothing was safe!

Me: hahahahahahahhaha! oh my god. that's horrific.

Brian: The pickles weren't horrible, actually. Stay away from cheese juice, though.

Me: I can imagine.

Brian: You might think, "Hey, I like cheese and I like juice, so..." But no.

Me: I do think that a lot.

Brian: You and me both. I had the courage to act on it.

Me: oh my god. I'm laughing so hard.

Brian: Good! Learn from my mistake! Never buy a juicer when you're bored.

And there you have it, folks.

Smooth Operator update!

Wow.

So I sent an email to my boss about mr. wannabe-phone-sex-operator 34. And I cc'd the head of security. They are *so* cool. The head of security forwarded it to the property manager who promptly called the company supervisor.

Apparently, they record all their phone calls!! I've been vindicated!! The supervisor said he was "absolutely appalled" and the property manager is going to call him back tonight to find out what happened with it all.

woot!