Bring it on, pizza purists!

I love the California Pizza Kitchen.

There. I said it.

I know it's an evil chain bent on destoying the 'art' of making a traditional pizza (NY, Chicago, Sicilian, what have you.)
I know that I'm a lost soul in the world of pizza and if I just try this great little place down on 5th and what-the-hell-ever street, I would abandon this mockery of pizza.
I know that the people at CPK probably dine on newborn children and laugh when people get herpes. Or something. (just kidding, CPK! Don't sue me! wanna talk about it over a pear and gorgonzola pie?)

But boy howdy, do I love that pizza anyway.

New York pizza sucks and you all know it. I don't want people to look at me like I have a third head when I order artichoke hearts, eggplant and portobellos on my freakin' pizza. And Chicago style pizza, while adequate in the toppings department... well, I don't eat that as a matter of pride, you see. One slice is a meal! If I can't kill a good 1/2 pizza in one sitting, I will hang my head in shame the rest of the week. No, sorry Chicago. You're out. As far as traditional Italian pizza goes: I'll admit I've never been to Italy. But I'm sure there's something wrong with their pizza by the way Mario Batali makes it on the Food Network. Seriously, that man needs to be stopped. I can just see the freakshow now: "We put extra pig fat on it for you! You know, the good kind that's right above the hoof!"
Great...

But the California Pizza Kitchen- THAT'S a pizza I can dream about. Japanese eggplant on a pizza? BRING IT ON! Broccoli, goat cheese and roasted corn? I'll take one, with a side of another! And don't even get me started on the appetizers, folks. I'll be here all day.

So, hate me if you must. I've spoken the unspeakable. Life's too short to avoid yuppy pizza on some ill-conceived notion of "authenticity."

Now, proceed to tear me a new one.