But it's reached a new low and damnit, and I can't stay quiet any longer.
Enter the newest model from the Hoover line of vacuum cleaners:
That's right ladies! You are officially EMPOWERED to vacuum where, when and how YOU want! According to the commercial, you can even put it into "hush" mode so as not to wake your napping hubby as you vacuum around him! Then, you can run to join your hubby on the beach because you were EMPOWERED enough to finish your housework early! Good wifey! Good wifey!
Also according to the commercial, "Hoover gets it."
Okay, CLEARLY Hoover does not get it. They are so far from "getting it" that I think they should be charged with false advertising for using the words "gets" and "it" anywhere in the same sentance. Much less right 'effin next to each other.
Let me explain, Mr. Hoover Man:
1. Co-opting feminist terminology to hock housecleaning products is really not cool.
2. If my hubby is napping while I'm doing the housecleaning, I WANT to wake his ass up. I'd rather invest in a vacuum that plays Iron Maiden's Greatest Hits on full volume than one that has a pansy-ass "hush" button.
3. If it really allowed me to control "how, when and where I want to clean" it wouldn't be called a vacuum, now would it? It would be called the Super Clean Bot 4000Z. In other words, women, in general, don't ENJOY cleaning.
4. My husband and I just spent a fat wad of cash on a new Dyson Animal so nyah nyah.
Okay, that last one wasn't really a marketing tip. But it felt good to say nonetheless.
I sent all of this information, via a curse-filled email, to the good people of Hoover. The last time I complained to a company based on feminist ideals, the low level email receptor signed me up for a whole bunch of bestiality spam mail. I can't wait to see how this one turns out.
1 comment:
Much appreciated, mr. nutty butters. You foul little blogger, you.
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