4.01.2005

4parents.gov

So the government has a new website called 4parents.gov. It's about the sex. Specifically the teens having the sex. Hilarious? You bet.

They offer helpful tips for parents who are trying to discuss the possible consequences of sex with their teenage children. "But how would a parent bring up such a conversation?" you ask yourself. Fear not! The feds have provided this little gem for you to break the ice:

Some guys go out for a good time over the weekend, and end up with thousands of dollars taken out of their paychecks for the next 18 years. Do you know how that could happen?


Now THAT is a good way to start a productive dialog with your child if I've ever heard one. For my money though, the following is the way to go. See if you can spot the entirely-unsubliminal message here. (hint- it has nothing to do with sex!)

I was at the store yesterday and ran into Kendrick, Mrs. Jakes' son. He joined the military after high school. What do you think you want to do when you graduate from high school?


Far be it from me to suggest that this administration might use an "informational" website to up their military ranks but... that's pretty much what I'm suggesting.

The glossary is fun for all as well. I thought they were actually going to do okay with the abortion thing for a second:

An abortion is a way of ending a pregnancy before a live birth occurs by removing the fetus or unborn baby from the uterus.
They just couldn't leave the 'unborn baby' schtick out. Still, I'm impressed that terms like "baby killer," "child-hating feminist" and "bomb an abortion clinic- for fun and profit!" were left out. That shows a lot of restraint.

I looked everywhere for mention of "the gay" and found only one small section... which referred to homosexuality as an "alternative lifestyle" and then encourages parents to send their kids to a shrink that "shares [their] values." Other than that, the gays don't seem to exist. I suppose they were all in therapy when this website was created.

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